15/12/2015

It's been a while since my last post. Apologies for that. I must admit, nothing has occurred to take me away from the blog. That is except for a deep dark fog. Holiday blues, turned into full throes of a blissful engagement, and then the woes of not having the stability I need or crave. What to do. What, what, to do? (Rhetorical question.)


I have turned my back on the things I used to love. I think it's partly the move to this place, where I see obstacles to a happy existence everywhere I turn. Why can't I go for a run? What is holding me back? I know it is because I see the differences between this place and the easy running routes of Cambridge before it, and Bournemouth before that. Why can I not just be content where I am? This is meant to be a refuge from normal life. Living in a comfortable house, with the seagulls around in the sky, a warm bed to sleep in, food on the table, and the sea close by. A haven of cheap rent and familiar surroundings. But I am seeing problems everywhere. The space I have is not my own. therefore I feel like a burden. I feel a great lack of control. Perhaps that is just it. It's about control. Yet if I choose to go for a run and I do it, then I have the control don't I? If I choose to sit here all miserable, then that is my choice, and again, the control is mine. If I choose to go to work everyday, earn money, spend little, and save up, then there is a plan, a will, and a way to move onwards and upwards, surely? Why bury myself in self-pity, when all I need to do is get out the door. Keep my head down and get on with it...?


What do I want my future to contain? Why can I not just be satisfied that this is a period of downtime. A place of R&R.

Goddess Guidance Oracle Card reading - 15/12/2015


MIND Pele (1)
BODY Sedna (2)
SOUL Sulis (3)


(1) Make a list of your Priorities.


(2) Restore Balance in Yourself.


(3) Go to the Fountain of Healing Water in Bath.